1. As a child growing up in Minneapolis, we'd drive down Lake Street and pass Walter Drug. Newer to spelling and reading, I was under the impression that Walter Drug was somebody's name and "drug" was actually "Doug," the same name as my dad. One day in Sunday School, we wrote our parents a letter for our teachers to send them in the mail. Such a fantastic idea! What a surprise it would be for my unsuspecting parents to receive a letter from their own daughter! I wrote the letter and my teacher addressed it under my close supervision. To my dismay, she addressed it to Doug and Patti. Naturally I had to fix the spelling error, so when she wasn't looking I slid the envelope across the table and changed it. Sometime during the anxious waiting that week, we drove past the store and just to be sure I asked my mom what the store was called. My heart nearly stopped when she told me. I was mortified. How could I have put such a terrible word on this surprise letter to my parents!? Sadly, my excitement turned to dread and I was forced to spend the rest of the days waiting for the mailman on our porch swing in hopes of intercepting the mail before my mom would see this bad word in place of my dad's name.
2. I once carried around a chocolate Easter bunny covered in tinfoil for several days before realizing there was chocolate inside. I thought it was just a pretty bunny.
3. I pride myself in having played many different sports growing up. Tennis, soccer, softball, basketball, swimming, volleyball, etc.. But before all of this, it was ballet and tap dancing that had my attention. Every night our instructor warned us not to jump off the stage, but to take the stairs. Every night, we longed to ignore that counsel. One evening, no doubt in anticipation of our upcoming show or under the false illusions of being a great ballerina, I leapt off that stage in true Juilliard fashion and promptly ran into a table. I cried all the way to the ER (though somewhere I got an ice cream bar in there) and still remember walking into that room that was starched white with nothing but a silver table in the middle. My tears slowed as I asked my dad where the sewing machine was. Relief washed over me, my anxieties cast away, as he informed me that being "stiched up" didn't mean that my head would be placed under a Singer. Phew.
4. I didn't know until 2011 that there was a difference between VW and BMW.
5. I was reading one day in college and saw the word "breakfast." For the first time in my life, I wondered why I had always said "breakfrast." ....there isn't an "r" in there! I was soon comforted by the fact that Jessica Miller and my sister both still added the r, so I guess that one wasn't just me :)
7. I always thought the Delta blankets were free for the taking on airplanes. Last year I was informed this is not the case.
8. In 5th grade Rachel J and I got caught passing notes and had to put the notes on the teachers desk. To my utter embarrassment, Rachel had written that "breaststroke" was her best stroke in swimming. I quickly scribbled back that it was "breathstroke," distressed that she thought that it included "breast" in the name.
9. I spent one summer biking around Lake Nokomis spreading my bubble gum on my tongue and sticking it out for the world to see. I was so proud to have perfected blowing bubbles that I didn't check in the mirror to see that I had done no such thing and really was just sticking my tongue out at everyone we passed.
10. My first diary entry ever was written at the age of 8 and went something like the this, "Dear Secret Diary, I like someone and if you can keep a secret I will tell you how (who) I like." I proceeded to list a number of boys in my 2nd grade class. These lists lasted until at least the 8th grade. Why I thought this was the point of a diary and that lists of 5-10 boys were acceptable, I will never know.
11. My parents went on 3 different cruises while I was in grade school. My mom wrote us each a note for every day they were gone and Mrs. Gregg would give them to us each morning or evening. On the final cruise in 4th grade, I read a Titanic story one day at school. I knew it might be a bad idea, but told myself it was okay because I would know by evening that mom and dad were okay. That night, Mrs. Gregg gave me two letters since she wouldn't see me the next morning before we left for school. I asked her how she already had the letter and she had to explain to me that my mom was not sending them each day from the ship...I didn't sleep much the rest of the week.12. I thought my dad played for the Minnesota Twins and knew Kirby Puckett before I was born because he had a picture at the Dome in a Twins jersey. I told someone that once camping and they told me they they recognized my dad's name, verifying my story.
13. Barney warned kids of putting sunscreen on around their eyes. I thought he warned to be careful when putting sunscreen IN your eyes, so I called Bekah in one day to put sunscreen in both of our eyes before we went to the beach.
I didn't believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, walking on clouds, or that the Tooth Fairy was anyone but my parents giving me a silver dollar under my pillow, but somewhere along the way I made all of these assumptions. I can only surmise that there are plenty of puzzling discoveries yet to be made!
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